I still remember vividly a concert by Virgil Fox in Charlottesville, Virginia, many years ago. Fox was touring with his gigantic Allen electric touring organ, and speakers were distributed everywhere on the floor of the basketball arena (University Hall) where the concert was held.

He was playing the schmaltzy part of his program, that included Bach's "Sheep may safely graze" ... and about midway through the quiet, restful piece, at a point where he changed registration, his foot went to a note on the pedal board and there was an unimaginably loud fortissimo HONKKKK. Obviously he had pulled the wrong stop or hit the wrong combination. He recovered immediately, but he did look visibly shaken at the time. After the initial shock of the sonic assault, I could barely restrain myself from laughing out loud.

At the beginning of the first reading yesterday:

"They devoted themselves
to the teaching of the apostles and to the communal life,
to the baking of bread and to the prayers."

Bless his heart, a nervous confirmand today started reading the Gospel of Luke instead of the first reading from the Acts of the Apostles. A priest, who was seated nearby, ascended the ambo and kindly turned the lectionary back a few pages. In his confusion, the reader then had Peter at Pentecost saying to the Jews that Jesus the Nazorean was condemned to them by God with mighty deeds, wonders and signs, which God worked through him. [Make that commended.]

And, because of a previous posting - although it was not misread at Mass - I couldn't help hearing in today's Gospel that Jesus was made known to them in the baking of the bread. I must also have smelled lunch being made for the Bishop!

I am sitting at a coffee shop barely able to contain myself reading some of these posts!!! The only thing I can contribute is our priest's incredible, booming baritone voice that is made all the more comical by his over-enunciation. During communion, all you can hear is "The BODy of Christ......the BODy of...." and you get the idea. After communion he seems to wait for what feels like a long time compared to others, then a huge, booming "LET US PRAY!" wakes everyone. My 8 and 7 year old boys took a long time to hold in their snickering when we first started attending our church. His voice truly is incredible, and I'm sure he would have had a career at the Met had he not gone to seminary. Anyway, keep the posts coming I need a good laugh LOL!

I accidentally accented the wrong syllable at the Easter Vigil: MAria became maRIa. (Sorry. For those who will be scratching their heads, the one is the name of the mother of God, and the other is the properly inflected form of the word "sea", as in "He has drowned the horse and chariot in the sea". I was asked to sing 1st and 4th prophesies at the EF Easter Vigil. )

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Yes, Salieri, but is it AH-veh, or Ah-VEH?

I'd say there's about a 50% chance that every Litany of the Saints has a Saint BAY-sil.

Depends on where you are as to how Basil is pronounced. The British seem to pronounce it differently than many Americans.

I know. My ancestors on both sides of the family fought in that war.

We easterners tend to say Baaah - sil as in sheep baaah.

"He testified with many other arguments, and was extorting them..."

Today's homilist: "Christ will take you to h'v'n" but he pronounces heaven with such a low tone it sounds like "hell". That'll give you a jolt in your pew.

A priest friend wrote today, "No, gentle lector, St. Paul did not shave his head because of an oaf."

Our sacramental priest, whenever using Eucharistic Prayer II: "...we may merit to be co'hairs' to eternal life..." When he first came this bugged me no end, but have learned instead to offer it up for the Holy Souls and be grateful to God we have a priest.

Last Friday at daily Mass, the first reading discussed Festus and Felix, among other names. The lector pronounced both of them “fee-tus” (as in, an unborn baby).

Ok. I've avoided this thread for months and months. And have not read it. But if some of us as musicians want to engage the people in music, is it really right to keep an active thread on 'the people's' foolishness. Again, I have not read it and don't want to, so my comment has probably been made several times above. Grr.

Slips of tongue and mispronounciations are not foolishness- they are human nature, and sometimes comical. And no doubt, musicians get just as much flak, as I did on Pentacost Sunday when I accidentally sang the responsorial psalm for the vigil mass instead of for Sunday. A woman in the back row jumped up as soon as I was done and waved her missalette in my face while whispering rather loudly, "you sang the wrong verses!!!"

Ok. I've avoided this thread for months and months. And have not read it. But if some of us as musicians want to engage the people in music, is it really right to keep an active thread on 'the people's' foolishness. Again, I have not read it and don't want to, so my comment has probably been made several times above. Grr.

I believe your circumspection is well meant and, yes, others have correctly reminded us in this thread that humor may easily go awry. However, I have read all of the posts and laughed a great deal. I find each one is also a reminder to laugh at myself as a member of the fallible human race. Our risibility in this context, I think, need not necessarily be equated with sneering condescension. Thanks for expressing your concern.

That said, I did enjoy the mispronunciation of refuse in today's reading. It is the stuff of good jokes, punch lines and word play.

I know about the lard. I heard a local reader pronounce it that way.

Today one of the lectors kept mentioning the conversation between God and a BRAHM. Is that, like, the singular of Brahms?

CGM, uh-BRAHM is the correct pronunciation.

In my baptist days, we has a preacher who was very famous for his spoonerisms. Two that I will not forget: 1.one day there was a large bouquet of flowers on the communion table in front of the ambo where he was speaking. He went on for awhile graciously thanking the ladies club for the beautiful flowers...then he said: "let us pray: O
God our Flower...."2. During a powerful sermon, he was speaking about how we all need to be responsible for our own actions....revving up to the top of his delivery, he said "and I tell you, there shall be no shame blifting in this church!"

I find both pronunciations in online searches. In my parish the priests always say uh-brahm so that is how I pronounce it. Maybe one of the scholars here will clarify....

Recently, at the Prayers of the Faithful, at an Episcopal parish...

"...for Justin, the Archbishop of Canterbury, Michael our Presiding Bishop, Marc our Bishop [... and other leaders, etc... ], that they may bring the wider church to our awareness awesomeness..."

"a reading from the Letter of Jammess" (2 syllables)