You beat me to it.

"Why can't I have three eulogists at my mom's funeral?! Mayor Menino did!" *sigh*

I just looked at the program. I wish I hadn't. I was upset with OEW as the psalm, but now I see "We Remember" listed as the ...MYSTERY OF FAITH?! Please tell me that's not what happened or that they mistyped "We Proclaim..." I tuned in during the communion procession.

"We Remember" has had a long life as a faux Memorial Acclamation in certain places like the Lucien Deiss's "Keep in Mind". Largely faded after the new Missal three years ago, but I am not shocked to see it.

Unfortunate music selections.

You know, there’s no copyright attribution here. They broke the law in reprinting this stuff without that, and especially for posting it online.

Just sayin’ …

I can't even get past the cover page without getting frustrated...

wow... same old schlock.

Surely there is someone at the diocesan level whose concern includes such things …

My *guess* is that the funeral details were arranged principally by some organizational associates of the late Mayor, with some contributions by the family, the parish, and the funeral home, with perhaps a review by the diocese as a last step.

With so many bad choices in the funeral program, the diocesan reviewer might decide to only deal with the worst issues. Let someone else correct the copyright violation, and regret the complete clichéd banality of the songs chosen. (After all, boring sentimentality is not against the law.)

At least some barbarities were avoided. Two of the four eulogies were placed before the Mass instead of during it.

And instead of having the prideful "My Way" sung in church, it was sung outdoors after the Mass. If it's so great, perhaps it should have been sung at the cemetery!

My guess is that this is the same thing that happens at most parish funerals; no one wants to challenge the choices of the family because they are experiencing a death...and what they know and like are the things we see in this program. The more powerful the person, the less that anyone is going to challenge the choices. A very tough pastoral situation, and one in which I have chickened out many times for the sake of peace.

It's called just doing the sensible and pastoral thing.

Yes. I hold out for good music when I can, but don't get in fights with the family. Our associate pastor is really good at running interference with the family if they ask for anything truly outlandish.

How is it "pastoral" to let songs be sung that trivialize the mass, or go directly contrary to Catholic tradition or even doctrine?

It's not always a matter of "fights with the family" or "dogmatically insisting upon every rubric." Have a written policy in place, give it to the funeral homes, and mention it quietly before the family makes their requests. Leave service music (psalms, memorial acclamation, etc.) out of the mix, or suggest that questionable songs be done at the wake, or before the funeral, or instrumentally.

There are ways of having a more Catholic funeral mass without rancor or confrontation, but you shouldn't give up before you begin.

Melo

In The Garden was programmed at my mother's funeral 3 weeks ago*. The next sung music was In Paradisum (the chant). The counterpoint was intentional, and spoke to her faith. I strained not to be a Music Minister Mournerzilla (when I said I had a special request, with some heaviness in my heart, the parish volunteered at how open they were to special requests at funerals: drums, et cet. - so I felt my special request was modest). I had no control over the service music (which most of those attending did not know the settings of - the parish staff in attendance did, though - and I had raised that as a possible issue but was ignored), but given there were only 15-20 mourners in a large church, we had simple hymnody (I Heard The Voice of Jesus Say, the Gelineau setting of Ps 23, Day Is Done (yes, the text is most apt for vespers, but also for the death of someone who lived in growing darkness due to severe macular degeneration for the last decade of her 90 year life), and The King of Love My Shepherd Is. All of which sounded good with a lone cantor, organist, and tiny congregation in such a space.

* Why? One might well ask. Well. My parents closest friends in mid-life were Presbyterian. They had avid ecumenical faith discussions for decades. They introduced my mother to In The Garden. Sentimental? You bet. But it spoke to a heartfelt personal relationship and hope, which was reinforced when the wife suffered and then died from cancer. Given my mother's long physical decline and final suffering, the song gained in its liminal associations of faith hope and love for her and her family. It was most fitting in this specific context. I was prepared to have to argue about it, but fortunately didn't have to. I DID however, have to spend the early morning hours of the day of the funeral (first email from them at 1:30AM; final email around 9AM, funeral at 10AM) in dialogue with musicians who had problems accessing the attachments I had sent them 3 days earlier at the direction of the parish staff....the problems were not at all with what I sent but their stupid parish email accounts. I just loved working with my IT brother on a technical workaround while we were trying to bid farewell to my mother's body at the funeral home that morning. It was ... memorable.

How is it "pastoral" to let songs be sung that trivialize the mass, or go directly contrary to Catholic tradition or even doctrine?

Well perhaps we're talking about two different things.

Using "On Eagles' Wings" as the Psalm and singing "My Way" or "Somewhere Over the Rainbow" in place of the Psalm would be two very different proposals. In the case of "On Eagles' Wings," I think we should accommodate the request since the piece is based upon Psalm 91 and the bishops' conference has given credence to the idea of allowing paraphrases for Psalms. A broader debate about the authority of the bishops' conference to do so could be had, but a funeral is neither the time nor the place, and you don't have a lot of solid ground to stand on to refuse. Using "My Way," or anything else, on the other hand, it out of the question.

Pervasive in this kind of a response is the philosophy that while certain things are ideals, they're not seriously to be attempted in real life. Liturgies educate, because they are public acts of worship, rites of the Church. When this sort of nonsense is allowed to go on, either by those who actively promote it or by those who shrug their shoulders and call it "sensible and pastoral", people form the opinion not that the Church is being pastoral or sensible, but that this is how things ought to be.

Well, see my above comment. In my own situation, as far as ideals, I think we implement quite a few: On Sunday, we typically only use the organ, Gregorian chant is quite prominent in our liturgies, and Latin is used regularly. A funeral is not the time to educate family members, many of whom might just be returning to the Church or have simply fallen away from the Church, about why Psalm paraphrases shouldn't be used.

Why did a bishop recently get pilloried when he decided laymen couldn't preach at Mass? Why do people hold up Bishop Bruskewitz as such a disconnected-from-reality troglodyte, whom no one needs to take seriously? Why did Humanae Vitae receive such a blistering response from theologians and, now, a 'ho-hum' response from most of the laity?

In your first example, the bishop took action against something specifically labeled an abuse, not something which could possibly be justified. As to your second example, I don't hear much about him either way, but it could be because I don't live in that part of the country. Your third example is way beyond what we can discuss in a message board setting - indeed, it is the outline for a semester long graduate level theology class.

I happen to agree with you. But I thought that this didn't appear in the GIRM but rather in "Sing to the Lord." Is it in the GIRM too?

The one place I really held firm when I was in the Catholic Church was the psalm. I never permitted a family to request a paraphrase. On my sheet, I simply listed the psalm number and the first few words of the antiphon without indicating a setting. More often than not, the family checked one of those without question allowing me to choose whatever setting I wanted. I typically went middle of the road and used R&A , but occasionally used Marier's exquisite setting of 23.

Of course, I called into question choices that really were not appropriate and usually people understood. My guidelines were clear from the get-go so I rarely had issues. I rounded out the sheet with some of the typical, albeit less objectionable, schlock which appeased those that wanted it.