Amen!

Just as you mentioned this, I was finishing up a new wedding music guidelines packet to be distributed to couples.

I have had weddings weekly for the last 6 months, sometimes 2-3 weddings in a week. We just finally slowed down a bit.

I don't dread it too much, mainly because where I am a wedding doesn't happen often at all. For instance, the first church I worked for I never had a single wedding. There were several at the church, but since it was a small town, EVERYONE was personal friends with the local Lutheran organist and I was a stranger, so guess who they wanted? At the other church, I had funerals and weddings at an 18 to 1 ratio. Now I work at a church so small even funerals are uncommon!

>> It's not about the people who are there, but about the photos.

My wedding was wonderful, and is (I have been told) still discussed at our home parish as an ideal wedding.

But the photos were terrible.

Oh well. We have a much more important keepsake: a happy marriage that started off on the right foot.

>> I don't understand is WHY weddings are so annoying

Supposition 1: People have no taste.
Supposition 2: People have no sense.
Supposition 3: People think that personal taste should drive liturgical decisions.
Supposition 4: Wedding couples (or just brides, or just bride's mothers) think that they (not the Church, the priest, or the musician) are the primary liturgical decision makers for their Wedding.

Conclusion: Weddings will be planned and conducted in a manner lacking taste and sense.

Any potential wedding woes at my and my bride's wedding were solved by negating Suppositions 1 and 2 (we have good taste and good sense). However, this is not a reliable method generally. The solvable problem lies in Supposition 4.

My sensibilities conclude that wedding ceremonies, whether "sanctified" or secular is of no concern, have become anachronistic. They provide a more elevated rationale for the occasion of having yet another party, except that it's not all that necessary to even "dress up." (An aside, our wedding coordinator had to twice ask a guest this last Saturday to remove his baseball cap, whilst another middle aged male guest felt entirely comfortable "witnessing" and receiving the sacraments in his bermuda shorts and sandals.)
Virtually every wedding this summer evidenced the following:
A couple whose understanding of anything ecclesial or liturgical was indeciferable.
An "aggregation" of guests devoid of any evidence of knowing why they were there save convention and the reception to come, virtually any vocal or visual assent or participation, and as mannerly as any audience at the local cineplex.
A wagon train of limousines, videographers, maids and groomsmen decked to the nines, flowers every other pew (we seat 750+) and every other sort of seriously expensive trinkets (crystal lasso's etc.), and these weren't rich people.
And so on.... I intuit that even many of our clergy (in the general sense) have also resigned themselves to the decadence that overlays this generation's understanding of sacramental marriage, and have allowed themselves to be lulled into a pro forma performance of their duties. Can't blame them, really.
I don't determine this as discouraging. But I wish the church would not do what it does, typically pay lip service to the basic question "Why do you two want to get married in a church?" It's almost as if the answer "Because" suffices and everyone sighs a breath of relief and starts ponying up large amounts of cash.
And btw, we receive the same stipend we did 39 years ago, hundreds less than the market calls for now. And I've known of couples who think nothing of leaving a sawbuck honorarium for the priest/celebrant.
Arranged marriages and kidnapped brides in Asia almost seem romantic compared to our cultured mediocrity.

Can we suggest they show us their budget and ask for 1% for the church and 9% for the poor? (Adjust the figures according to your reality.)

As with many other things...those suppositions could be corrected with proper catechesis from the pastor. A good first step would be printed guidelines about what is allowed and what is not in your parish. This only works if the pastor and the DM back each other up of course.

I still advocate that nuptial vows/rings can be exchanged at scheduled Vigil and Sunday Masses with little muss or fuss. Benefits?
Witness to the "faith community" that does attend Mass regularly.
Witness to the visiting guests who don't, or aren't RC.
Impressing upon the consciences of wedding "stakeholders" the theological, life-long communal aspects of sacramental marriage, ie. Christ in the household, the Church as Bride of Christ.
Elevation of the "we" ideal, rather than submission/suppression of the "me" ideal.
Elimination of the false economy of stipends.
Separation of church and state issue is somewhat mitigated, and the role of the church and her ministers clarified.

and some lengthy redundant homilies could be truncated because of schedule demands. Ahem. Done now.

All I know is that a lot fewer people are bothering to marry in the Church these days. I remember when morning weddings became an endangered species; now, even afternoon weddings are getting much less frequent.

So help me, I like weddings. Maybe it's because I've done less than ten, or had no real problems.

Oh, I find them interminably boring, and my dating life makes me despise the whole idea of romance. But everyone's generally happy, and it's not like a funeral where you have to turn down dear aunt Sally's favorite song. And there's the big fat paycheck!

I don't think people are getting married as much at all anymore. And yes, certainly far less in any church at all.