What would you have done for a 14 year old's funeral?
  • henry
    Posts: 244
    A 14 year old girl was murdered and received a lot a publicity from the press. A funeral Mass was said for her in a Catholic church, and the newspaper mentioned that "Amazing Grace" was sung. Given the publicity of this case and the extreme grief of the family, would you stick to the the recommended like "Eternal Rest" for the Entrance and "May the Angels" for the Recessional, or would you make concessions given the circumstances? Usually, for anyone over 7 years of age I do the "recommended", but I don't know what I would have done if I were the musician for this funeral.
  • Joseph Mansfield
    Posts: 113
    I would do the recommended, the usual. One value I see in having a fixed, written liturgy is precisely that it tells us what to do in an extreme situation, i.e., the usual. The familiarity of the usual, like a soft old slipper, might well help to take the edge off suffering and allow the family and close friends to reflect that God is taking care of this soul, just as he cares for other souls sent off with the usual liturgy.

    As for Amazing Grace -- if Sister Snakebite were the one pushing for it I would say nix. If it were the mother of the deceased I would use it. The situation described is not the time or place to militate against that tired old cliche.
  • Charles in CenCA
    Posts: 2,416
    I don't think we have any business or benefit by speculating on what "we'd have done" in this specific circumstance.
    Speculation seems as focused as the ideal image we hold, but it isn't reality, nor is it informed by hindsight being 20/20 and whatnot.
  • noel jones, aagonoel jones, aago
    Posts: 6,611
    Are not the words of Eternal Rest and May The Angels more fitting than any American Folkhymn for a Catholic who has died, under any circumstances?

    I am reminded of a misguided musician who admitted recently to programming Healing River for the funeral of a person who had drowned in a river. Seriously. And then tried to claim the family requested it be sung. Even if that were true, the minister should have stepped in and halted something that many would have found tasteless.

    What Joseph has said is right. If Catholics want to be comforted by music and texts, especially texts that are not in line with Catholic theology as many have stated about this song, then sing them at the wake.

    Does a priest who celebrates a Mass at which music which challenges Catholic teaching commit a sin?

    This does take us off the speculation, no?
  • benedictgal
    Posts: 798
    This past weekend, I volunteered to help with the funeral music for my aunt's brother, whose Mass was Saturday. Unfortunately, the family could not get an English-speaking priest at the Cathedral, so the Mass was in Spanish. I spoke to the celebrant and asked if I could chant the SEP and he was fine with it. I also chanted the responsorial psalm in English as well as the Gospel Acclamation in English. What I used was the SEP (Introit and Communion) for the Mass from All Souls Day. It was the first time that the SEP had ever been used at our cathedral and the family was surprised (in a positive way).

    I cannot tell you how frustrating it is to go to funeral Masses where the contracted musician plays "Eagles Wings" and "Here I am, Lord". She does not deviate from her repetoire. She does sing the "Ave Maria" and "Panis Angelicus", but, that's the closest the deceased get to decent music. Another contracted musician likes to play "Heaven Must Have Needed an Angel". Unfortunately, the problem down here is that no one says anything and the funeral homes are not exactly liturgical experts. Thus, it's not necessarily the family's fault, but, the musician whom they contract to play and sing.
  • chonakchonak
    Posts: 9,220
    "Heaven Must Have Needed an Angel"? That's theologically incorrect: human beings do not become angels when they go to Heaven; angels are another species of creatures.

    Lucky for me, I've never heard the song.
  • francis
    Posts: 10,847
    It's time to stand up for the Church teaches and promotes without exception. There is a right and wrong. Join me in the RCMP. See thread on this board.
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