Over the past year or so I have thought a lot about whether or not I should wear a head veil of some sort in church.
I know that St. Paul clearly says women should, but many dismiss that as being a "cultural directive."
Then there is the great debate about whether or not the tradition was ever abrogated (the article http://catholicintl.com/epologetics/articles/pastoral/head-covering1.htm seems to think it wasn't.)
And then of course there is the whole issue of a tradition 2000 years old...
However, my biggest reason against doing so is simply "what other people would think." As in, I don't want to be weird. (but even in that regard, I am lucky, since at none of the 4 places I regularly attend [daily] Mass, would I be the ONLY person wearing one!)
But not just on the surface, since once you start wearing a head veil, don't other people judge you and think,"oh, she's one of those weird super-traditionalists..." and put you in a box, but those are precisely the kinds of people you want to be *open* to you and your thoughts on the liturgy! Don't you isolate them (or isolate yourself, depending on how you look at it,) by wearing a veil? (or am I just making excuses..)
I am always glad for the very rare occasion when I get to go to Mass somewhere that head veils are common, and so I don't have to worry about what others think.
Any thoughts especially from women who have seriously considered all this? And if you decided to wear one, what WERE the reactions? And if not, then why not? Or any thoughts from anyone on a theological level?
I've covered my head at Mass and at least inside Catholic churches since just before WYD in Cologne in 2005. On big important feast days I wear a white mantilla (I'm unmarried and go for symbolism in general), but most of the time I wear a kind of headscarf that ties behind my neck. It's really simple, just fabric bought at a store and cut into a triangle shape.
At first some people, especially my friends, asked me why I was doing it, and I did my best to explain. Now I think people are just used to it, especially as I tend to forget that the scarf's on my head and end up wearing it for most of the day :P
One insight I find very important is: doing something will, ideally, follow understanding WHY one would do it, BUT deeper understanding will also follow simply DOING. When I started I thought I understood why I was doing this - but now, more than three years later, I think I have a much more profound grasp on it. It's been a real journey.
I wouldn't worry about what others might think of you. If Our Lord is asking you to cover your head in his presence, go ahead and do so. If you always simply let Him guide you and increase your understanding, all people will see will be the GOOD (unless they just don't want to see the good of it, in which case they're just grumps and you wouldn't have made much of a difference either way). Don't be afraid!
I was just thinking about that the other day. I wear it only when I go to EF mass. And I was thinking maybe I should wear it when I sing with my schola in my parish.(ask my schola ladies whether they like to wear it too) It's traditional, beautiful and repectful as our chant is.
But then it might look rebellious to some? I don't know. As you said I worry about what other people think and misunderstand the intention. Singing Latin chant is already knew in our parish. It might be too much for the people in my parish to take. I'm going to ask my schola ladies next week what they think, and I'll let you know. Maybe I should ask my priest first whether it's ok. (do I need a permission to wear it form the priest? These days everything is very confusing. Trying to do something traditional requires a permission, when the contemporaries can sing anything and bring all kind of the instruments in the Mass.)
I heard in my country (Korea) ladies still wear them, no matter which Mass.
I kind of like this thread, ladies talk (although guys can pitch in.) I don't and can't get into much copyrights and other legal and business stuff. (Sorry, I know those are very important issues.)
do I need a permission to wear it form the priest?
Nope. Once - people here might giggle at this - I was asked to serve and I double-checked with him whether my headcovering (a small, neat black thing) would be ok. He beamed (but in hindsight that was a really weird situation!).
But then it might look rebellious to some? I don't know.
I think we had this discussion about bowties. Incidentally, I forgot to mention that I wore my first bowtie (besides with a tux) to church when I subbed at a Lutheran church on Advent II. I had considered switching over to them, but I think it projects too much authority :P At any rate, I got many compliments, and next time I play I'll have to wear my striped one!
My comments, as per the blog, are do it, so long as it's not one of those tiny tiny chapel veil ones.
I forgot to bring into the discussion how I had a conversation with a man I trust very much, and he brought up the whole issue of how distracting it can be to be sitting behind a woman and looking at her hair and and neck. (and I must say, I have nice hair! :- P )
Hey, anything to help my brothers in Christ be chaste!
Which, I must also mention, I think a tiny little piece of cloth on top of one's head is silly and sort of defeats the purpose. Another guy friend of mine also told me that the lace mantillas just make him think of a bra. (he said, "what else has lace on it?!") He liked the byzantine/orthodox custom of wearing a more scarf-like thing, and someone else described that to me also, but I can't picture it. (like, a total muslim head scarf?) does anyone have a picture of what that might look like?
I have no clue where to continue this conversation, since it's going on in 3 different places at once :P
If a man is distracted by a woman's neck and hair, I have 2 things to say to him: 1) You're a pervert. 2) Don't ever go to an American mall.
The covering I'm thinking about is this: http://farm1.static.flickr.com/190/500110329_6c599b3a48_o.jpg I find that dignified, in an understated sort of way. Not drawing attention to one's self, but not plain either. I still say you should go for a big floppy hat, though.
Everyone in EF I go wears lacy ones. So that reminds guys of something else? I think that's a bit too much. I never thought that way. There are many things besides... made of laces. I have black hair, so I got black lacy one (a long one). I thought that way it doesn't show off too much. Not good? Advice please, before I do a foolish thing.
Gavin. That's the 'Jackie-O' look. And as I recall, she wore that in her walks in Central Park. In church, she wore her mantilla or did she also wear her 'pill-box' hat?
You can wear whatever you think best dignifies the house of God, I suppose, but consider whether your donning the mantilla encourages those in other cultures who would impose such a head covering on women only. Unlike you, they have no choice in the matter.
We are children of God, male and female, and we were created and deemed good. Male chastity in your church is not an issue. Can your humility and reverence not be expressed adequately in other ways?
I don't wear a veil unless I'm going somewhere where I think a riot might break out at the sight of my uncovered red hair. I have a schola member who does and I don't interfere with that. When I'm on uncertain ground, I have a lovely scarf around my neck. (I accessorize well, thank you.) If need be, I can drape appropriately.
A recent discussion of this on Fr. Z's ended up with one gentlemen admiring the burkha, so let's not run down that path.
A great deal of this issue is cultural - and oddly very American traditionalist. At a SSPX Mass on the Camino de Santiago last summer, there were women with uncovered heads. Of course, Italians become unhinged over bare arms.
Unless you require that the women in your schola/choir/whatever adopt a uniform appearance in every way, I would hesitate to impose headcovering on singers who weren't already inclined in that direction.
In short, if you want to wear one - do. But let charity cover our differences on this.
Ooops, I made a mistake in saying 'ask.' I meant to say ask whether any of them want to wear it. (I edited my previous post. Thanks.) I'm hoping that our ladies like the idea,then I'll be more encoraged to wear it. Because there is no one in our parish. There is a big difference. I will discuss this with my schola ladies see what they think.
Besides being a cultural tradition, is there any Church's teachings on this?
I'm not saying don't wear one by any means. But I do think it can appear to be separatist. It doesn't really seem like part of our modern culture, or mine at least. Yet, at the same time I have no problem being counter-cultural when I strike my breast (on those rare occasions when we say the "I confess"), bow during the Creed or the Gloria patri, or receive communion on the tongue. In the end it's important to do what you feel is right, and not because you think you are supposed to or that you shouldn't. If you do choose to wear a head covering, however, it would seem to make sense to do it consistently, whether you're attending Mass in the OF or the EF.
It's a "cultural" tradition in that it was part of the Church's culture that women covered their heads in church. The codification into the CIC of 1917 was much like the promulgation of the doctrine of the Immaculate Conception - that is, it was not an imposition upon the faithful (ladies) of something new, but a setting down on paper of what had been there, unbroken, through the life of the church.
The 1917 Code is superceded by that of 1983. But the "cultural tradition" is still there.
Typing this out makes me think of the parallels between this and the use of Gregorian chant during the liturgy, actually.
Frankly speaking, I wear it in EF Mass, because everyone else wears it there. It seems very appropriate and respectful there and not awkward. I don't wear it in our parish, because nobody wears there. It would be pretty awkward in our parish. I receive communion kneeling in EF, but in our parish I do deep bow. I just felt that I don't want to stand out too much, and give impression to others I'm being more reverant because I wear the veil. But I do like the idea of continuing this respectful tradition in our church, especially when many people wear so much exposed clothes in the Mass these days. But if I start to wear it in my parish, I should stick with it.
(oooh, I love that I've started such a controversial post!)
Since it is true that the cultural significance is important, I picture women of the 1950s (and of course earlier,) scarcely leaving the house without having a hat on or some kind of head covering. It has almost always been...stylish!
However, that is certainly not applicable today! Since we no longer have the *cultural* proper-ness of necessity of head-covering, then does it apply as much that it is appropriate during church?
Let's bring back the fedora! Goes well with the bow tie, maybe..a la Walter Winchell. But I digress....I rather like the mantilla look but prefer a 'mixed' congregation. One should feel comfortable with or without. As for myself, it's 2 weeks 'with' and 2 weeks 'without'. With exception for 'various' feasts...which I 'play by ear'. When I was in Portugal last April & bought 3 mantillas (white, cream & black) at the Fatima Site. There are scores of religious shops at Fatima & only one with mantillas. It seems that women (if they wanted to wear head gear) wore a kind of 'navy' cap with a Fatima logo. (Not very attractive to my taste).
There was a very pius and modest young woman who began wearing a long black mantilla to Mass on Sundays. Bear in mind that our church is "gathered seating" with a capacity of 1400. She didn't entirely stick out like a sore thumb, but on the other hand her orthodox (a word I much prefer over "traditional" as it's sometimes used as an inflamatory term) sensibilities were well-known. Because we're a typical suburban parish, I can well imagine that there were some that clicked their tongues and wagged their heads. Given what passes for "appropriate church-going attire" by most Catholics these days, I say the more mantillas (and bow ties!) the better.
As our "music area" is at the front, I command a pretty good view of the congregation, and I remember one morning watching this young woman's little daughter (not even a year old yet) reach up and pull it off of her head (she always wore it untied). This went on several times and then she just gave up and took it off.
"Someone please clarify. Is it unseemly for a married woman to wear a white mantilla? I like to be informed!" Not at all. When baptisms by the Holy Father were televised last year, I recall that the white garment in which the newly baptized were "clothed" consisted of mantillas fro women, and a neck scarf for men.
This is a very timely issue for me. I personally like veils, but stopped wearing one after a brief post-pilgrimage stint because of all the looks. I'm not a timid woman per se, but it seemed to me that (in my parish) it was more of a distraction that the hair.
Now I just accepted a position at an EF parish, and ran right out and got a new mantilla- can't wait. But I'm not sure what to do when I go to OF daily Mass. Oglers aside, if I have my three little boys with me, a veil will likely not stay put...
The veil/scarf/hat question I have as a musician concerns being able to hear well. I cannot direct in a hat- love hats, but I can't hear well in one. I would like to wear a scarf, as it seems to be less fuss once tied correctly. Have any of you ladies had to direct in a head scarf? If you direct or sing, did it impact your hearing? Seems like it would...
I never conduct in a mantilla. So when I CHOSE to wear one, I put it on when I leave the 'loft' to receive communion. (EF Mass by the way...I never wear one for an OF Mass).
Well, I wore this morning with the encouragement from my 11 year boy and the schola people. I wore it and sang Latin chant . I was glad I did. I never saw one in our parish before. It occured to me that eveyone wears what they want to wear to Mass. It's better than me wearing a short skirt. I saw some good smiles, no frownings. But I don't think I'll wear it on Sundays with a big crowd, not yet.
Hmmm... I can hear well enough in one, and have worn a hat while playing or singing from time to time (and if our boiler goes out again, I'll wear a balaclava...) but I can't direct the choir in one. It's not in any way shape or form a schola, it's a choir and I dang near give myself whiplash and torn rotator cuffs trying to signal the simplest cut-offs, entrances or dynamics. A hat or veil would go flying... And anything with a brim impedes my peripheral vision too much, so I imagine a veil would do likewise, (I sit backwards at an angle with a mirror.)
But this line from this morning's office of readings struck me as pertinent to some of you and your thoughts on the topic: (it's St Bernard urging the Virgin Mary to say "yes,")
I wear a veil or other headcovering any time I'm in the presence of the Blessed Sacrament. This means at Mass, choir practice, walking through the church to get to the basement, or at any outdoor Mass.
I use two matching hairclips, so my veil never slips, even when being tugged on by young children. If I'm wearing one of my longer veils, I tie the longer parts in the back so that it stays behind me. There is no official protocol on veil colors vs. marital status.
It interferes neither with my organ duties, nor with my choir duties.
I am the only woman in my OF parish to consistently do this; everyone once in a while there is one other. What is more distracting - a veil, or the forty-something mom who bends over in her short skirt, or the college student with the "DrunkPalooza" t-shirt? A veil is no more distracting than beautiful vestments.
Geri, you're going to wear nuts wrapped in phyllo dough? Sorrry, I had to...
I actually didn't know that men "could" wear hats in church now, according to the canon. As per the article, I don't see why some people feel the need to force others (in this case women) into a mode of devotion they want. Heaven forbid a woman should have hair showing at Mass!
Well, I coudn't play organ with the veil, but I was able to direct the schola. (I pinned it ) It actually helped me not to over conduct. (It's like practice walking with the books on the head.) In conducting class with James Jordan, he showed how small gestures can be so effective. He told us that most us beat too big, and over emphasize the cut-offs especially in the performance. (I think Itend to do that when I get excited from the performance fever.)
With the good practice the choir can sing together without the over emphasis of a conductor he says. His fingers and hands were like magic. He was even able to shape our vowels the way he wanted just with his hands of small gestures.
capa20, that's a great blog post! In particular, I enjoyed reading the comments.
Here's some for starters:
"We veil those things we hold most Holy, the Tabernacle, the ciborium, and our women." hmm...
or:
"The proper mindset when entering a Catholic Church should be one of submission. Men show their submission by removing their headcovering and women by covering their head. The great enemy of submission is pride. If you dont know that women take great pride in their hair and general physical appearrance than you aren't married to one. To veil this in the presence of God can be a great act of humility. The mere fact that even good women so often bristle at the veil is proof of just how powerful a symbol this is."
or here's my favorite that I've personally found applicable:
"I like wearing a veil because the sides of the veil down the side of my face work like blinders to help focus my eyes on Christ."
"you're going to wear nuts wrapped in phyllo dough?"
Ooooh.... I would if I could (is there ANYTHING tastier? my first voice teacher was Greek, and oh, could she cook... sorry, way OT)
"with the veil, but I was able to direct the schola. (I pinned it ) It actually helped me not to over conduct."
Now that's a good thought. I probably over conduct. No, I absolutely KNOW I over conduct. Today, for instance, when I managed to get a hand free and picked up a piece of neon orange paper and waved it in the air at arms length, in big sweeping arcs, in a vain attempt to get the attention of my favorite bass... My conducting teachers would be so ashamed.
It's not accurate. It's someone with a chip on his shoulder being angry because things haven't gone his way in 50 years.
Bottom line on that: if he's right, the code of cannon law is wrong. If the code of cannon law is wrong, then there is no reason to trust the earlier code of canon law requiring it.
It confounds me to no end why men feel they have any right to give orders as to how women should carry out their devotion. Somehow I suspect most of these guys are single...
Females of the board: if you like it, whether you think it will give offense to others or not, DO IT! If you think it's silly or conflicts with your fashion, DON'T DO IT! It's a big church, you have room for both.
IMHO (I'm absolutely no expert on this), I've seen photos of women receiving Communion at Mass from Pope Benedict both with and without a head covering. It appears to me that either is ok. I respect anyone wish to honor traditional customs. I think it would be very sad if an issue like this would make anyone feel unwelcome at Mass.
Well, my concern is, if it's not a mendatory, and I chosse to wear it because it helps me to remember I'm in the presence of the Lord and helps me to focus on HIm, is it going to alienate me from others? Is it going to make others very uncomfortable and unwelcomed?
"is it going to alienate me from others? Is it going to make others very uncomfortable and unwelcomed?"
Yes Mia. "I have not come to bring peace but a sword." That is the burden of the Cross; if others reject you because of Christ, it is a blessing. Why let people who reject Catholic tradition and culture determine your devotion?
I wore it yesterday(Sunday) and today (OF). I wasn't embarrssed and actually I felt very natural to cover my head. It also helped somehow my mind from going into several directions. I'm a weak person, and I need a reminder. Our Church used to have lots of beautiful traditions and customs that we threw away. They used to help us to remember the presence of our Lord on the altar and reminds of Heaven. Our church doesn't have any holy statues, or beautiful paintings of angels and saints. The altar is bare and the church looks, someone says, like an Itaian restaurant. The other day our priest was pretty upset at the sight of the spill on the carpet in the church. He was saying that people don't have any respect for the house of God. I felt very sorry. Maybe people forget that they are truly in the house of God. All the clothes they wear at the Mass, all the mess they leave behind after the Mass. But I don't want to be pessimistic, we can help each other.
I don't want to look like an old lady:
http://www.canadafreepress.com/images/cover0404.jpg
nor do I want to look like a muslim:
http://www.brisbanetimes.com.au/ffximage/2008/06/11/250headscarf,0.jpg
and neither do I want to look like an hindu:
http://www.terragalleria.com/images/india/indi39580.jpeg
I don't really want to look like I'm trying to make some kind of fashion statement either:
http://image56.webshots.com/156/2/80/52/2609280520085392709BcfaHB_fs.jpg
too much will make you look like a nun:
http://www.utexas.edu/features/archive/2002/graphics/veil2.jpg
sometimes a scarf that you just "happen to be wearing" really does look like a winter scarf, and so I can only get away with that 10 months out of the year here in sunny Michigan. (joke intended)
http://www.provocraft.com/projects/images/kniftyknitter/35.project.s.jpg
St. Paul says in Corinthian cover your head (women). But then later he says there's no such custom in the church. It's very confusing how to interpret it. It's more confusing to me that it became a Church's custom once and required, and somehow the custom disappeared. I don't think the Church says anything specific about this anymore. (If there is any spcefic instruction I'd like to know.)
I think it's your call. What do you think?
How do you feel when you wear it?
I think the jury is still out on the interpretation of those verses in Corinthians. If it was very clear and explicit, the Church never would have let the practice die away. My personal opinion on those verses is that Paul is saying, essentially, "don't scandalize the Jews, people." If it's a custom in a place for women to wear head coverings, then wear them; however, if you're in a place where that is not the custom, you don't have to.
Therefore, my personal policy is, if I'm visiting a parish (these are usually Orthodox) where practically all the women wear them... especially if they actually hand out the head scarves somewhere for those who don't have one... then I wear one. Otherwise, I don't worry about it. It's important to follow one's conscience in the matter... wearing a scarf in a place where no one wears one is not all that scandalous, but not wearing one where everyone does is.
Really, I think anyone who would be scandalized by you wearing one just doesn't get it. I get it, even if I don't wear one myself. I admire people who follow their convictions like that.
It just occured to me that all the reasons that women don't want to wear it somehow nothing to do with God or the Church. On the otherside, all the reasons I read that women want to wear it have to do with God, not how I look.
It has been many years ago that I heard it, but I am thinking there were other factors specific to the Christian community in Corinth that prompted the instructions about head-covering (and the cutting of hair by women). Perhaps someone more knowledgeable than I could give better information... but from my RSV Bible: I Cor 11:5-6 ..but any woman who prays or prophesies with her head unveiled dishonors her head -- it is the same as if her head were shaven. For if a woman will not veil herself, then she should cut off her hair; but if it is disgraceful for a woman to be shorn or shaven, let her wear a veil.
I think it had something to do with the women at the pagan temple in Corinth who, essentially, were prostitutes. I believe they typically either cut their hair very short, or even shaved their heads??? Can anyone enlighten us as to the facts of this? Perhaps, taken in the context of the times, it may shed some light?
My apologies if my memory has tricked me and my facts are wrong...
Now that the practice of attending Mass without a veil has continued for over thirty years in our country, it has acquired the status of a custom. And for women who don't wish to wear a veil, they can continue to not wear one, just based on the fact that it's a custom. They can even do so at a Mass in the old form.
The Church is not severe about these things. After all, the lack of a veil is not something intrinsically wrong.
It just occured to me that all the reasons that women don't want to wear it somehow nothing to do with God or the Church. On the otherside, all the reasons I read that women want to wear it have to do with God, not how I look.
This is exactly the point for me. I started wearing a veil about 5 years ago but it took me a least two years of prayer and study to come to that decision. I finally got to the point where my only objection was fear of ridicule and God made it clear to me that His wants were paramount. I expected a great deal of snickering and finger pointing from a subset of the people at my parish but was amazed that there was none (at least, none in my hearing.) Instead, I received many compliments and polite inquiries about why I was wearing it- many from people that I had never met before. Many older ladies told me that they still had their old veils at home and seemed quite wistful about them. Now, there are about a dozen ladies and girls that veil at our parish.
For myself, I veil out of respect for the Blessed Sacrament and as an act of reparation for the disrespect so often shown for the Eucharist by Catholics and non-Catholics alike. It has the additional benefit of helping to keep me focused when inappropriate things/music are going on at Mass. I make no claim that these are universal reasons to wear a veil. Most of my friends do not veil and it is not an issue between us, but many have started to do so. I have even served as cantor while wearing it. My daughter (age 12) and I wear them wherever we go. We haven't gotten thrown out of a church yet. :)
Jenny, thanks. I wore it on Christmas eve. I was very reluctant because it was children's Mass and there are usually so many people. Somehow I felt I still should wear it. I did. (I was the only one) It was good. The Christmas program and all the people who came to see it and the noises... It made a whole lot difference to me. I was able to concetrate that I was still in the presence of the Lord. Of course it's just me, no one has to agree.
Do I have a choice? No, I don't think I do. CIC 1983 canon somethingverysmall (it's like c. 6, I think) doesn't force me to, but my heart and longing for Christ does, bundled in with the long long long tradition of women covering in church.
"The Lord loves a cheerful giver" lol - there's this beautiful interaction between wanting to do something and being required to do something. I want to cover, I don't want to not cover, and I consider myself ordered, forced and compelled to cover. No, I don't really understand it either :D
To participate in the discussions on Catholic church music, sign in or register as a forum member, The forum is a project of the Church Music Association of America.