Stay or switch parishes
  • argentarius
    Posts: 68
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  • bhcordovabhcordova
    Posts: 1,152
    Stay. Unless you are willing to rebuild things from the ground up.
    Thanked by 2tomjaw Roborgelmeister
  • TCJ
    Posts: 967
    Sounds like a poor setup. First thing you would probably have to do is can the current choir. Having six 70-year-olds who want to tell you what to do would be a nightmare. Even if you let them go as gently as possible, there's almost sure to be people working behind your back to make life miserable for you.
    Thanked by 4tomjaw LauraKaz Roborgelmeister Elmar
  • francis
    Posts: 10,668
    Precarious situation. Unprofessional. Tail wagging dog.
    Thanked by 3ServiamScores LauraKaz Elmar
  • MarkB
    Posts: 1,025
    If you are happy where you currently are and don't need the extra $10k (pre-tax, it's important to note) per year, then stay. It's not worth the risk. Poor odds on this bet, I think.

    But if you are dissatisfied with where you are or need the additional $10k (pre-tax) per year, then it's worth taking the risk.
  • Diapason84
    Posts: 76
    If I understand correctly, the same day you called the business manager and he told you the diocese froze the hiring process, there was another interview that day? That seems shady to me, so it’s another negative on top of their leaving you in the dark for six weeks. The hiring process appears to be handled in a disorganized fashion and is not above-board. Ask yourself: Do you want to work with a pastor and business manager who stonewall you and give you possibly dishonest answers down the line, when you run into disagreements with them or others?

    If choir members were empowered to add their own criteria to the job description, you can safely assume that you will not be permitted in reality, despite the BM’s assurance, to “handle things as you see fit.” If the choir’s conditions were listed as mandates rather than honest pleas for help, you can bet that they will be directing you, and the pastor will hear about it if you don’t comply with their directives. Given that he relies on non-professionals for advice during interviews and lets them define job descriptions, do you think he will default to trusting your professional opinion? Perhaps, when folks complain about you, he will not answer your calls or emails, and will one day announce that you’re not a “fit” and there’s the door?

    Run and keep running.
    Thanked by 4tomjaw LauraKaz mmeladirectress Elmar
  • argentarius
    Posts: 68
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    Thanked by 8CHGiffen mattebery irishtenor tomjaw Charging3296 ServiamScores LauraKaz Elmar
  • liampmcdonough
    Posts: 283
    Why wouldn't you just ask? Say, "hey your business manager said the diocese was stalling things, but another parishioner said you were trying to interview another candidate. How come I'm getting two different stories?"
    Especially if you are best friends with the pastor.

    Also, you are in a position to negotiate since
    1) you have been told there are no other candidates and
    2) you are prepared to walk away

    So just edit out the part of the job description you don't like and send it back.
  • Diapason84
    Posts: 76
    I wouldn’t take it on faith that the OP is the only candidate. If he was told that, he was also told that hiring had been frozen the same day another interview was conducted.
  • argentarius
    Posts: 68
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    Thanked by 2ServiamScores CHGiffen
  • SalieriSalieri
    Posts: 3,177
    As uncomfortable as it may make you, just ask them the questions that need to be asked. Tell them that you've been told contradictory things, and would just like to know the actual facts of what's going on. Listen to the answers, watch the body language, and you'll get the information you need to make the right decision.
    Thanked by 3ServiamScores Elmar bhcordova
  • argentarius
    Posts: 68
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  • bhcordovabhcordova
    Posts: 1,152
    I would say it is plausible. A good chunk of my work is for non-profits that get funding from the Department of Housing and Urban Development. Ofen the jobs are on hold for a year or longer, then clearance to proceed is granted and we have to get started quickly.
  • argentarius
    Posts: 68
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  • Elmar
    Posts: 500
    Without your original posts it is not easy to comment...
  • Diapason84
    Posts: 76
    Like I said before, would you trust the business manager and pastor to give you straight talk? Clearly they’re either highly disorganized, withholding something, or both. You will likely be in for more of those communication games (putting it mildly) if you ever get a real offer and accept it.
    Thanked by 3Elmar Anna_Bendiksen tomjaw
  • a_f_hawkins
    Posts: 3,372
    I am beginning to see this as - you are clearly their best, or only satisfactory, candidate for the job, but they don't want you. That could be because they don't want to poach you from a neighbouring parish, or it might be some less creditable reason.
    Thanked by 1tomjaw
  • ServiamScores
    Posts: 2,724
    I wouldn't waste another minute on these people. Wish them the best and say and Ave for them, and then just move on. Nothing but red flags.
    Thanked by 4LauraKaz francis GerardH tomjaw
  • francis
    Posts: 10,668
    Yup. Run. Totally untrustworthy.
    Thanked by 1tomjaw
  • PaxMelodious
    Posts: 426
    Neither stay or switch: Look elsewhere. Both of these are a a headwreck.
    Thanked by 1tomjaw
  • jcr
    Posts: 132
    I was once hired by a protestant church where there was a plot among a few in the choir and the organist the "get rid" of me as quickly as possible. I didn't know any of these people, but it seems that they didn't like their pastor very much. Since he had hired me, I was a bad guy by association. I knew nothing of the animosity against the pastor, of course, but my first several months there were quite a trial.
    Later on, in a Catholic church, my wife and I encountered a similar situation where we met with opposition from much of the choir, most of the staff, and, when the pastor moved on (in none too good shape by that time) the new pastor had been told all sorts of things about us that was very imaginative. He eventually became wise to the situation and we left there some time later on good terms with him.
    Although I don't see anything in what you have described, I do think that there are too many irregularities in the process to let it go without knowing much more about it. If the disorganization is symptomatic of the way they do business, you'll be chasing your tail the whole time you work there. I'd get some clarity about the present problem or withdraw my name for consideration.
    Thanked by 1tomjaw
  • argentarius
    Posts: 68
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  • Diapason84
    Posts: 76
    All I’m seeing are red flags. I don’t know what else to add.
    Thanked by 3ServiamScores CHGiffen LauraKaz
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